“Who will you choose? The one who loves you are the one you love?” It isn’t easy to answer this question, is it? Many people ask this question especially from text messages if ever this situation comes to them and of course many people have different views and opinions on this matter. But what if you actually face this dilemma? Who will you choose?
Actually, having this kind of situation is worse than what you think especially if you really are facing this kind of dilemma. Having someone love you is something to be thankful about. Sure, it makes you feel happy and proud to have someone love you and care for you. Having someone text you, update you with everything, and practically do everything just to be with you also makes you feel very important in that someone’s life. But what if you don’t love that person? What will you do? Isn’t it hard to decide what’s the best thing to do? And worse is, what if you actually love somebody else?
It’s something very hard to think of based on experience. You would not know whom to choose. You will always have doubts and reservations at the back of your mind. You will keep asking yourself “Who do I really love? Who makes me happy?”. But one thing I learned about in this situation is that you have to choose someone who makes you feel happy even if that someone doesn’t really give everything you want to. In love, it isn’t always about happiness. You also have to experience trials and struggles for you to become strong enough as a person. You also need to sacrifice. You have to sacrifice even if it means hurting someone else’s heart just for you to be happy. Yes, it’s not good to hurt someone’s heart. No one has the right to do that. But if it’s what you need to do for you to be truly happy then why not take the risk? It might be worth it especially if you see that the one you love also starts to see your worth even if it’s too late.
Another thing I learned in this situation is learning how to give second chances. If the one you love doesn’t love you at first and even hurts you then realizes your worth soon after, maybe it’s rightful enough to give that person a second chance. I know it sounds very martyr-ish and stupid. Even my friends tell me that giving second chances after being so hurt is some kind of an act of heroism and stupidity. Well, I couldn’t blame them. I understand my friends concern for me. But everyone deserves a second chance I guess. Just because the person did something bad before doesn’t mean you have to curse that person to death or hate that person for life. You also need to learn how to forgive but never mind the forget part. But you also have to keep in mind that if you already gave that person the chance, you must also make that person do something for you for him to prove that he truly loves you and that he’ll do anything just to prove that he’s worth the chance he’s given. Sounds wickedly stupid, huh? But if the person you love is the one who truly makes you happy, then go for what you truly feel. Follow your heart, I must say. At least you’re being completely honest about yourself and not using the person who loves you as “panakip butas” just to make up for the missing part. In the end, it’s your happiness that matters, right?
But being completely honest about yourself can also hurt people. Sometimes even if you don’t intend to, you break someone’s heart. But you don’t have the choice. You always have to choose. It’s either you choose to hurt someone else and be happy or you choose to hurt yourself so as not to hurt the person. Either way, someone else has to be hurt and it’s up for you what to choose. And no matter what happens, you must always keep in mind that whatever decision you have made, you must never regret it. After all, it’s nice to look back and remember that once in your life you had to face this kind of dilemma and be proud that you experienced it.
Sometimes love isn’t also about being always ok and being always happy with the one you love. You should also learn to be hurt and feel the pain for you to know lessons which will make a stronger and a better person in return. In fact, even though if the so called love makes you feel stupid 99% of the time, it also helps you to become wiser in return. As the saying would go, ”Stupidity makes you wiser only in its weirdest sense..”. Even though you have to undergo through a lot of pain, sufferings and sacrifices, you should always keep in mind that you are doing it for what you think is right. In the end, what matters again is your happiness and what your heart truly desires. Go for what you think is right for you. Go for what makes you happy. Follow your heart. ^_^
